A Gusty Monday Afternoon

Blimey - what's the weather doing today?? She's just set off for the tube (on her way for an aromatherapy massage at the hospital) & she was almost blown down the road by this incredible gust of wind!!

It's stopped raining for the moment, though, so I may be able to get to work without being drenched ... if I'm lucky!!

Late Saturday

I needn't have worried - a brilliant evening, with brilliant mates. I feel much better tonight :o)

Saturday - Day 4 of Cycle 2

It's been an upsy-downsy week; that's the way it goes, I suppose.

We went to see the Oncologist on Monday & she's put on 11lbs since she last saw him. The Dietitian was very surprised & very pleased & the Onc said: "if the cancer's really bad, it's often impossible to gain weight", so that sounds promising. (She has understandably mixed feelings about the weight gain, but she certainly looks good!!)

The Onc asked her if she's started losing her hair yet ... that "yet" was a shock as previously everyone on the medical teams has said she isn't expected to lose it. He said she's unlikely to go bald but she will experience hair loss within the next week or two. That did come as a blow to her & a surprise to me, too.

He was able to throw some light on the cold damp nose she's been experiencing since she came out of hospital. He said cancer itself can cause sweats & the chemo drugs also cause thinning of the mucus membranes.

The visit was very hard on us both; even though he told us stuff I'd known before, it was still like hearing the diagnosis afresh, over & over again.

Cycle 2 started on Wednesday & this time it was clearly a bad experience for her. She felt very, very low - even despairing - all Wednesday evening. She's been coping well since Thursday, but there's no repeat of the hyperactivity she had after the last cycle. She's just tired & very subdued. An additional side effect, this time, is a general puffiness in her face & hands.

She talked to the chemo nurses about the hair loss & they said again that she won't lose her hair. When she told them what the Onc had said, they just shrugged & said: "Huh - Doctors!!" Although that sounds comforting, these constant contradictions actually make things worse.

She's experiencing taste changes, too; she said anything mint flavoured burns her mouth (& both toothpaste & red wine are as fiery as a hot curry). I'm surprised as how hard it is to find toothpaste without mint in it.

I'm going out this evening with some diving friends & it's just starting to dawn on me that I've forgotten how to make small-talk!! I hope the skill comes back quickly, or there's a strong risk of me putting a damper on the evening ... or Lor' - I hope not!!

Friday

I'm the one who hit the wall, today - & I'm not even on chemo!!!

Thursday of Chemo-Free Week

She's on her week off chemo this week & we've had time to sit down & consider the trends:

Day 1 = Chemo

Days 2-4 = 3 days of hyperactivity

Day 5 = 1 day coming down from hyperactivity

Day 6 = 1 day of narcolepsy

Day 7 = 1 "fairly normal" day

Day 8 = Chemo

Days 9-11 = 3 days of hyperactivity

Day 12 = 1 day coming down from hyperactivity

Day 13 = 1 day of narcolepsy

Day 14 = 1 "fairly normal" day

Day 15 is the start of the chemo-free week & we're on Day 16 today. Chemo starts again next Wednesday, which will be Day 22 of Cycle 1, or Day 1 of Cycle 2, depending on which way you look at it.

I'll keep an eye on the trends & see how they continue.

She's had AWFUL stomach gripes over the past few days. I'm not sure what they're linked to, but it does seem pretty likely that the hyperactivity is linked to the steroids she's prescribed for the 1st 3 days post-chemo, to increase the efficacy of the anti-nausea meds.

I've had a LOT of work this week & am really, really tired. I'm also suffering retail-therapy withdrawal symptoms. I need to get shopping again. I know I don't like clothes shopping (clothes just don't interest me), but Primark has just opened in the Mall. I really think I should go & explore it as soon as I've had enough sleep to enable me to face the crowds.

Sunday

Ooooohh - I have new followers!! This is exciting!! Welcome to you both. :o)

The hyperactivity disappeared when her 3-days' supply of additional (post-chemo) anti-nausea meds had been used up. They're steroids, apparently. I know she was told they may disrupt sleep & cause her to eat like a horse but, as she's not eating inordinately more than usual, we hadn't made the connection between the hyperactivity & the tablets.

She hasn't hit the wall recently, though, so maybe there's still some working its way through her system.

She's doing well & looks terrific. Brilliant!!

Friday - Chemo Day 10

2 days post-chemo & a new side-effect has become apparent ... HYPERACTIVITY!!! :o)

She's talking 19 to the dozen & has been gardening, cleaning & tidying - all at the same time. It's great to see such energy but we're waiting for the "chemo wall" to come up & hit her over the head again.

She says she feels so well at the moment - which is absolutely WONDERFUL. Long, long, long may it continue.

[p.s. The TV is fab, fab, FAB]

Thusday Evening

The telly has arrived & was set up with lightening speed by the lovely guys from my local Sony Centre. All I need now is for the quality of the programmes to be improved so I'll have something good to watch on that gorgeous flat screen!!!

Thursday - End of 1st Chemo Cycle

Yesterday was Day 8 of Chemo Cycle 1 & seems to have gone very well, although it took longer than Day 1 (6 hours instead of 5). I couldn't go, 'cos I was teaching 9.00 - 2.30, but Franco went with her.

It took 5 attempts to get the cannula in this time (it looked soooo easy last week) as her veins hid whenever a needle came near, so Franco's attempt to teach her to crochet had to be aborted as every time she twisted her wrist to regulate the tension of the cotton, it set her drip alarm beeping.

But some BRILLIANT person did the Race-For-Life recently & donated 4 portable DVD Players to the Chemo Unit, so sis & Franco watched DVDs, chatted & giggled.

They don't have many DVDs, though - so if anyone out there has any to spare, please donate them to the Guy's Hospital Richard Dimbleby Day Centre & earn the patients' (& visitors'!!) eternal gratitude.

My new TV is due to be delivered this afternoon, then tomorrow I pick up the new lamp - I'm getting excited. This retail therapy lark is quite fun!! :o)

Sunday Evening

To appropriate a line from the Macmillan campaign ... Today was a good day.

We did some major furniture shifting & reorganising of rooms & we're both happy with the way the rearrangements have worked out. Mind you, buying lighting this afternoon & moving furniture this evening has rather wiped me out ... so early bed!!

Starting tomorrow, I've got 3 weeks work, covering an absent colleague. I'm not good at getting into the classroom, bright-eyed & bushy-tailed, for 9 o'clock starts but it'll pay for the new bed, new television & new floor lamp ... oh, & hopefully for whatever I'm going to buy myself next week, as well ... ;o)

Goodnight!! xx

Sunday - Chemo Day 5

Apparently it's very warm outside but it's BUCKETING down, so I haven't ventured forth yet.

Her Fortisip had a slight metallic taste today - it's just the vanilla ones which have been affected by "chemo-mouth" so far, but that could be a problem ... she was given 2 months supply of Fortisip last week & all but 4 of the bottles were vanilla flavour (that's 44 metallic flavoured Fortisip to get through ... UGH!!)

I'm off to Angelo's Lighting this afternoon to buy myself another present.

Saturday - Chemo Day 4

She has flutterings in her throat, breathlessness (but no significant increase) & the feeling that the tumour is growing ... it all sounds absolutely VILE but is fully in keeping with the Mac Nurse's warnings.

It's the tiredness which seems most debilitating, but EVERYONE says that's to be expected!!

I missed WeightWatchers this morning; I decided a sleep in would be more beneficial. ;o)

Friday - Chemo Day 3

We're into a new phase now; chemo has started. Today hasn't been brilliant but, over all, it's "so far, so good".

We met her Oncologist last Monday, then her Chemo Nurse (Hannah) this Monday & she went to be pumped full of toxic chemicals two days ago. When her GP told her she'd be "pretty busy" once Chemo started, I wasn't aware quite how literally he meant it.

She's on a 3-week cycle: Gem/Cis on Day 1 + Day 8 & then 2 weeks off (which, basically, means two Wednesdays on & one Wednesday off).

The treatment took 5 hours in all;

1. Water Tablet

2. Saline drip (half hour)

3. Anti-nausea meds

4. Gemcitabine drip (half hour)

5. Saline flush

6. Cisplatin drip (one hour)

7. Saline & mineral drip (one hour)

8. Home until next time

She said she felt nothing during the treatment & has been feeling pretty okay (apart from exhaustion) since then. Today was the first time she talked of nausea, some tingling & a bit of tinnitus.

It's all so new & so scary, but at least the treatment's started & we're on our way.

... & how am I?? ... I bought a new television (retail therapy never did anyone any harm & I'm not interested in clothes). I wonder what I'll buy next week ... ;o)

Teaching Weekend - Saturday

She's now put on an overall 1.5kg, since she came out. I was sooooo ungruntled with my own eating pattern yesterday, that she bought me a handful of Thorntons' Continental Chocs to comfort me. Some of you may consider that cruelty in the extreme, but she did succeed in cheering me up no end & I lost 0.2 kg on them; I'm now back under my acceptable limit of 5lbs over Gold.

PHEW!! Thanks, honey ... & bring on the Thorntons!!! :o)

Poll: Cholangiocarcinoma Awareness Month

Here's the link = Poll: Cholangiocarcinoma Awareness Month - click on it & vote!!

Wednesday

She's put on a WHOLE 1.1kg in the past 2 weeks, after eating chocolate (belgian, of course), ice-cream, pizza & drinking whole milk, lucozade, full-fat Lilt & 3 x Fortisip per day.

I've put on a least 3 times as much in a shorter period, after living on air & optimism.

Laura?? Don't know - but she was damned heavy sitting on my bad leg all night ...

GOOD MORNING, WORLD!! I'm actually much happier than that message sounds!! :o)

Another Monday's Arrived Already!!

I can't believe another teaching weekend is creeping up on me & I still haven't posted since the last one!!

It's been two whole weeks since she came out & she's doing well; we're all doing well, in fact. In many ways, the trickiest bit has been the fact she's under doctor's orders to regain the weight she lost in hospital - but, however hard she tries, I seem to be the one who's putting it on!! She does find it rather ironic that she should be ordered to eat for England, after all the money she spent at WeightWatchers getting her weight down in the first place, but she did lose a lot during her stay in hospital & appreciates the need to increase her energy levels before starting chemo.

I, of course, have no such reason to pile on the pounds - &, if I don't stop trying to match her intake, I'll have to start paying at WW again. I've been at my Gold weight for 2 years without ever being charged - & last week I was RIGHT ON THE BORDER ... one more measly ounce & it'll start costing me again. If that isn't an incentive, I don't know what is!! :o)

My new guest bed arrived last week & it is - without a doubt - THE most comfortable bed I've ever owned. I've been sleeping like a log every night since I got it. I had to go & buy a set of Allen Keys to put the headboard on, but - wha'th'hell - it's GORGEOUS. I'll forgive any little niggle for the sake of a good week's sleep.

Talking of sleep, Laura's started to divide her nights between my sister's bed until the early hours & then mine until I get up. The only problem with her choosing this particular arrangement is that, when it's my turn for her company, she doesn't walk round the bed to get to her chosen sleeping spot, she walks straight across me. At 4am, it's not the most restful experience to be trampled by an adult cat who is putting on weight at the same rate as her human!!!

Oh well, my new bed is calling me. I'll try & post again soon. Night, night all.

Saturday - & October Already!!

Blimey - it took FOREVER for my legs to stop aching after the teaching weekend; I had to up my painkillers in the end, which has left me feeling queasy. Hrrrumph!!! GRRRR!!!

H-O-W-E-V-E-R ... we have some GOOOOOOD news, too. She's OUT. The docs did the ward-round on Monday & said "you can go". In NHS terms, of course, it doesn't actually mean you "can" go ... it means "begone & free up this bed forthwith, if not sooner".

So, within hours of being told to begone, she bewent ;o)

And here she is - & it's SO GOOD to have her here (if a little disorientating for all 3 of us - sis, me & Laura, who's not sure whose bed to curl up on at the moment).

My new guest bed arrives on Monday. I saw it online & phoned to get some more information on it & was very impressed with the guys who run the website. When they heard why I'm buying such a good (& by no means cheap!!) foldaway bed, they did everything they could to expedite delivery. In the end, I had to reassure them that I'm not actually sleeping on the floor at the moment - I have a perfectly decent sofa bed already - I just want one upstairs which is more for "permanent" use, rather than having to make up the downstairs sofa bed every night & put it away every morning. They phoned me yesterday & said it's arrived from the warehouse, so they'll bring it round on Monday morning.

Ooooh, I can hardly wait!! I so love gadgets!! :o)

Early Monday

After another 7.5 hours teaching yesterday, it's not just my brain which hurts!! :o)

Saturday

After 7.5 hours teaching today ... my brain hurts!!!